Teh Lion, Teh Wizard, and teh Towel Rack. (DONE!)

This is my version of C.S Lewis' classic book series, The Lion, the Witch and The Wardrobe.


Five kids were sent to a guy they don't even knoes house and he asks them to drop teir pantses. They scream and run into teh bathroom and lock teh door. One kid, named, Scott banged his head into a tile. "AH WTF IS THIS TILE DOIN' IN MY CRUNK FO'SHIZZLE?" Another one banged his head into a cuboard and goes, "OH NOES I AM BLIIIIIIIIIND!!!" That kid was Connor. Another kid, named Flareon, more like some dog, cat, fireplace hybrid thing banged his head into teh towel rack. No ones saw him, he was gone. So the other three, Scott, Connor, and Eagle, followed him in... "WOW WTF IS THE PLACE IT'S CRUNK IN TIS FO'SHIZzLe!!!!" said Eagle in amazement. And they saw this fat deer thing on steroids. "Who in GUTHIX's name are you?" said Connor. "I AM TUMSROID." said the fat muscly deer thing... "TEIRS TIS BISH NAMED TEH WITE WITCH, DO YOU WANT TO MEET HER???" he said again. "Umm... sure..." they all replied. Then Connor and Scott went behind the bush for a reason I can not explain. "FLAREON, WTF IS THAT MOANING SOUND???" said Eagle. "Eagle, I has noes idea. Its coming from teh bush." And they screamed and ran off to... I don't know, the White Witch..? They were just about to the witch's lair, before a morbidly obese lion stopped them. "HALTEH WHAT DO YOU WANTS?!" said the thing. "Who are YOU?!" said Eagle, cowering in fear. "I AM TEH APPLE." said Apple. "Can we come in?!" said Flareon. "YEH SURE JUST DONT MAKE MESS PLZ. PLZ KEEP KLEEN." said Apple. And he hopped off like a complete retard. And Connor and Scott ran up and goooes, "Let's go in." So they entered, and saw Paris Hilton sitting in a little white chair. "In mah story books, you bribe a witch so she doesn't kick you ***..." said Connor.
Flareon then pulled a pack of PokeMon cards out of his furry pockets. "What do you think of this?" said Flareon.
"Does it have a Flareon?" said the White Witch. "Prolly..." said Eagle. "What do you think?" Asked Flareon again.
She sat for a while then replied in, "It's hot." "Wait, where's Joe Dirt, our other brother?" asked Eagle. "CRAP." said Scott. "WHATS DO YOU WANTES?" said the Queen, bellowing. "Umm, on second thoughts, let's go..." said Connor. They all agreed and left. They went into the forest outside her house in her backyard. They saw a bunch of fat moles. "LOOK, MOLES!!!" said Flareon, eagerly. The moles screamed, which scared Flareon, and began to bite Connor's foot off. "GTFO OF ME YOU FURRY B******!!!!" he cried. Apple the incredibly obese lion arrived and went to Flareon, "Heel, boy." Flareon then sat. "I think I found a good place to hide... it's called CBGamez." Apple then teleported dem peepz to CBGamez. It was a huge block followed by smaller blocks containing pictures and letters. It had a big YouTube on top... Flareon quickly fell asleep. "heheroflmao, look Connor, he's dreaming of running." said Eagle, watching Flareon jiggle and whimper like he was running. So they started a Flame, or a Spamfire, and it looked like this.(*@#@*#*#) They all fell asleep, as Apple was snoring like he-ll. Flareon woke early, made breakfast, and got to playing Soulsilver on his DSi. The beeps and crap woke everyone up. "Did you make us breakfast plz?" asked Apple. "I ate it." said Flareon, still staring at the screen. "But I did something very important." Flareon quickly said. "WHAT?!" they all replied in complete and utter shock. "I found Arceus." he screamed. "..." they all sighed... "You all have to fight in a war plz." said Apple. Eagle spit out his coffee in shock. "A long haired knight will guide you." He was a kid with very long hair, and had a Death note shirt on. He had Popy tattooed on his arm. "HAI. wanna watch D. Grey Man plz?" "SURE!" They all reply.



SO MANY FRIGGIN' HOURS LATER.

"How about the one about ching-chong-lee?" Said Popy. "SEEN IT." all replied. "Let's fight!" So they went to teh war. Warriors were littered on the ground. Spam snipers sat in trees spamming @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
To any idiots willing to pass. They began to watch a knight fight. He had a mullet and was a midget. "OMFG JOE!!" They cried. "Hey." he said, waving. A spam knight then randomly popped up outta no where and hacked off his head. They all cried, and Flareon sat there holding his FlareonSAYS sign thing halberd. Eagle morphed into someting.... THE XBOX KID. He then shot video games and crap at people. "OH NOES HES DEAD." said Apple. "I has tis jewce I didn't drink." said Popy. He then accidently spilt it on Joe and he was alive. Paris Hilton then came... "IT'S HOT." Flareon hit her with his halberd and took her head. Thousands of warriors spammed greatfully. They then lived happily ever after at an area called SHININGEPIPHANY, where Eagle was HEADKING, Flare was Mod King, Scott died by choking on Spam, Popy was an anime addict, Connor was a King and ruled a clan called the Soul keepahs. They popped out of the towel rack many years later, only finding out it was actually just 20 minutes. The cops arrived, and arrest the PEDO. His name was POPYSEED11. "You kids were knocked out when you banged your heads on the crap." said the Cop. "S***." they all said.

TEH END.

Spoiler:

BOOK NAME!
PRINCE LUX: TEH RETURN TO SPAMIA.

Um......ok....

More has been added!

I saw and my answer is the same.

Is it gewd?

Even MORE has been added!

... Why do I run into a cupboard *complain, complain, complain*

Hey, I am a flareon in this so never mind.

Yeah, but you get scared easily, and stuff will happen.

Um, ya.... Does Eagle turn into an Eagle or something?

No he can easily turn into the notorious XBOX Kid.

Ok, well that could mean anyone here on the forums aside from a few.

More has been added!

This is the Cast.

Flareon as: FlareonMaster.

Eagle as: Eagle Eye307.

Connor as: Generalcon2.

Apple as: Applepie533

The Knight as: Popyseed11

The White Witch as: Paris Hilton.

The Warrior as: ???

Scott as: Himself.

I can see Lux...

MORE HAS BEEN ADDED!

That's all, Folks!

Very creative... and random.

I am not like that realize.

Lol and I will hit you with my sign!!!

WOO!
You capatured my uh... persunality perfectli!

LOL Popy,

Lolzorz

What do you mean by a sequel Lux?